What is Dysregulation and How Can Somatic Experiencing® Help?
The cultural conditioning of our modern world has led many of us to become disconnected and dissociated from our bodies, resulting in nervous system dysregulation. Our nervous system shapes how we feel within our bodies, perceive ourselves, and relate to others. When regulated, we experience a sense of inner peace and safety, and we are open to connection. However, dysregulation—often due to trauma, overwhelming experiences, or chronic stress—can trap us in unhelpful patterns, often labeled “mental illness.” Symptoms such as persistent anxiety, depression, overwhelm, chronic tension, illness, social isolation, emotional numbness, overreactivity, insomnia, difficulty trusting, and a pervasive sense of pessimism are all indicators of a dysregulated nervous system.
Symptoms of a Dysregulated Nervous System
Felt Sense: When the nervous system is dysregulated, you might experience constant feelings of anxiety or unease. Your body could be in a state of chronic tension and experience tightness in the chest, headaches, or digestive issues. Some people report feeling numb (“Going through the motions”), disconnected from their bodies, or unable to identify their emotions. It’s like being trapped in a body that’s always on high alert or completely shut down.
Sense of Self: A dysregulated nervous system can leave you feeling fragmented or unsure of who you are, which opens you up to entering an abusive dynamic with another person. You might experience persistent self-doubt, an overactive inner critic, or a sense of inadequacy. Overwhelm becomes a frequent companion, and you may find it difficult to manage emotions or handle stress, leading to feelings of helplessness or a total lack of control over your life.
In Relationship to Others: Relationships can become challenging when your nervous system is dysregulated. You might find it hard to trust others—which is the foundation of connection—leading to isolation or a feeling of disconnection even when you’re surrounded by people. Overreactions to minor stressors can strain your relationships (“the hot-headed friend”), you might rely too heavily on others for validation (“the clingy friend”), or feel overly responsible for others’ emotions (“the peace-keeping friend”). This can create a cycle of dependency that fuels anxiety, stress, and opens you up to abandonment, rejection, desperation, and loneliness. Those with insecure attachment have a dysregulated nervous system.
Perception of the World: When you’re in a state of dysregulation, the world can feel like a dangerous place. You may view your environment as unsafe or unpredictable, always expecting the worst or waiting for the other shoe to drop. This leads to a pessimistic and cynical outlook on life and within relationships, where you focus on negative outcomes and really struggle to believe in the possibility of good things happening. Distrust and hyper-vigilance can become your default modus-operandi, making it hard to exist in the world, see the positive in others, or have hope that things can improve.
With a dysregulated nervous system, everything becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy, reinforcing the beliefs you hold that people suck, the world is dangerous, you’re unworthy/unlovable, and no one can prove otherwise. Whew!
Signs of a Regulated Nervous System
Felt Sense: In a regulated state, your body feels calm and at ease. You experience relaxed muscles, steady and deep breathing, and a clear awareness of your sensations and emotions. There’s a sense of vitality in your inner and outer world, where energy flows naturally, and you feel connected to your physical self in a positive way. Think about how you feel after an amazing massage, an awesome workout, or a relaxing yoga class.
Sense of Self: With a regulated nervous system, your sense of self becomes integrated and strong. You have the ability to acknowledge and embrace the different parts of your personality (yes, even the ones that you’re working on), leading to healthy self-esteem and confidence in your abilities, intuition, and decisions. You’re resilient, able to handle stress without losing your sense of who you are.
In Relationship to Others: A regulated nervous system fosters healthy, connected relationships. You feel safe in close relationships, able to be vulnerable and share openly. You engage with others from a grounded place, able to truly listen, receive constructive feedback with gratitude, express yourself clearly, and set healthy boundaries with kindness and respect for all involved. You maintain autonomy while enjoying meaningful connections, without overly relying on others for emotional support.
Perception of the World: When your nervous system is regulated, the world feels like a safer place. You can face challenges with confidence, maintaining an optimistic outlook and believing in positive possibilities and outcomes. Trust becomes easier—trust in others, trust in life’s capacity to offer good experiences, and trust in your ability to navigate whatever comes your way.
How Somatic Experiencing® (SE) Can Help Rewire Your Dysregulated Nervous System
Somatic Experiencing® (SE) is a powerful therapeutic approach designed to help you move from a state of dysregulation to regulation. Developed by Dr. Peter Levine, SE is based on the understanding that trauma, stress, and overwhelming experiences can leave us stuck in a state of nervous system dysregulation. Unlike traditional talk therapy, which primarily engages the mind, SE focuses on the body’s natural ability to heal itself by working directly with the physical sensations associated with trauma.
Through Somatic Experiencing, you can begin to reconnect with your body’s innate capacity to self-regulate. SE helps you tune into the physical sensations that arise when discussing past experiences, allowing you to tune into the story the body is telling and process deep, unresolved emotions at a physical level. This process gently guides you to release stored tension and energy (remnants from trauma), leading to a greater sense of peace within your body and within your world.
As you progress in SE therapy, you’ll likely notice a shift in how you experience your body, your sense of self, your relationships, and the world around you. You’ll move from a state of chronic tension and overwhelm to one of ease and resilience. Your body’s natural rhythm will restore itself, allowing you to face life’s challenges with confidence, optimism, and a deep sense of groundedness.
If you’ve found that traditional (talk) therapy hasn’t brought about the changes you were hoping for, or if you’re ready to explore a deeper path of healing, Somatic Experiencing® may be the key to unlocking lasting change and a more regulated, balanced life.
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